Tewi's Two Jokes
by Eisfee
Summary: Tewi tries make Reisen laugh, and experiences some obstacles in the process.


For one starlit night, its air beleaguered with suffocating humidity and its fauna singing its usual nightly chorus, the residents of Eientei were eating dinner after another uneventful day. As Eirin had to retire for a brief span to once again coax Kaguya to come out of her bedroom to eat the dinner for which she worked so hard, only Reisen and Tewi were currently at their table, starting the meal at Eirin's behest. The two had found the meal to be quite delicious, as they were happily enjoying it before Tewi felt the pressing obligation to tell Reisen one of her classic jokes.

"Hey! I got a new joke! Wanna hear it?"

"Not really," Reisen replied without any chance for a beat to form.

"Come on! Why not?!"

"Your jokes are always stupid, crass, gross, or some combination of the three. All I want to do is sit through one meal without hearing any number of your jokes; is that such a difficult thing to ask of you?"

"But it's a good one! Trust me, it's fantastic! I worked all day on it, and it's a clean, family-friendly one! Come on, please?"

Reisen pondered for a slight moment in regards to her response: if she said "No", she would have to deal with eating dinner while listening to Tewi's childish whining about turning down the joke, and if she said "Yes", she would have to grin and bear through the awful joke (as it always is an awful joke), recover, and drum up a templatic accolade; from there, Tewi might shut up for once after hearing Reisen say "Now that's a funny joke; Tewi, you are funny! Goodness me!", leaving Reisen the time to enjoy her meal in a relative peace.

"All right, go ahead."

"Yes! Thank you, you won't regret it!"

Eirin, who arrived at the table dragging a sulky, resentful Kaguya, plopped her down to "her spot" (as Kaguya defines it) near the head of the table, before finally being able to sit down herself; she had inadvertently walked into Reisen regretting ever giving Tewi another chance to take on the near-impossible challenge of making her laugh, given that her face, even more than at a normal circumstance, could be defined as "irascible".

"Tewi, that…was the last straw. Do not tell me any more jokes."

"What?! It wasn't funny?!"

"Nope."

"But I worked really hard on it!"

"Tewi, I do not know what to say. It was even worse than I expected. Believe me, I'm doing you a favor by being nice and simply letting you know that you are not good at making jokes. You are not funny. Please; for just once in my life, I want to have a normal dinner. Never tell me another joke again."

While Eirin was enjoying the meal she made for them all, something was missing: their table, usually characterized by a joyous camaraderie which was punctuated at times with lighthearted conflict, was uncomfortably silent; Reisen's honesty, Tewi's blank expression and her barely eating anything before her, and Kaguya's guttural snoring from her falling asleep in front of the meal did not serve as benefits.

After the dinner ended, and after the night lived its lifetime in full, and finally after yet another uneventful day at Eientei, it was time for the succeeding dinner; just as before, Reisen and Tewi began Eirin's meal, as the chef had to, once again, drag Kaguya away from her room in which she enjoys avoiding any milligram of social interaction. Tewi could hear Kaguya's lamenting to Eirin becoming progressively more intelligible as they were approaching the table, and was eating silently, what with the scars of Reisen's words from the night before still remaining. Reisen was eating without words as well, but with an opposing mood of serenity; she could finally eat without hearing from Tewi's awful repertoire of jokes, after all.

Tewi spoke regardless, albeit in a reserved tone. "Reisen."

"Yes, Tewi?"

"I…I know you said 'No jokes' last night, but…can I have one more chance?"

"What?"

"I thought about it, and I decided to research some famous jokes online; it's not going to be from me, just a comedian. I…I know I'm not funny, but maybe another person's joke will lighten the mood in here."

"Tewi, I-"

"Reisen," Eirin interrupted while seating herself, "I think you should let her tell you the joke."

"…really?"

"I really do; I mean, how bad could it possibly be? I really think this time, she'll make you laugh. Come on. One more chance. Just give her one more try; you won't regret it."

Reisen was certifiably cautious, but strangely put at ease as well from Eirin's calm and confident manner of speaking. She turned to Tewi, whose eyes were begging for another attempt. After a pause to think, she replied, although with a feeling of herself being coerced to allow it.

"…sure. Go ahead."

She was grateful of Reisen for her allowance, and told her the joke.

Tewi was tense at first, what with Reisen being expressionless after the punchline landed; this tension was laid to rest when, finally, Reisen chuckled slightly behind a new smile. Even more, she was laughing heartily, pounding the table with her clenched fists. As the laughing became more profuse, advancing with more atonal harmonics, Reisen could not find her breaths, and was forced to fight for air amidst her fits of undignified and blithering laughter. With time, this conflict forced Reisen to the floor, and Tewi couldn't help but witness Reisen before her, utterly suffering by her joke in a writhingly jittery mass.

Eirin, who couldn't help but notice this development as well, announced to the table, "Excuse me, I'll be right back." and arose. She left Reisen, whose laughing at this point was more characteristic of screaming than of actual amusement, and Tewi, who should have been proud of her success in finally, at last, making Reisen laugh, ultimately regretting ever telling her the joke in the first place. Kaguya had fallen asleep, so none of this worried her at all.

Eirin entered her bedroom, and opened one of her myriad medical chests. Swift in the following action, she located and studied a vial alike all of the others in that particular chest, with only one exception: a label, with each vial possessing a differing one. Her resulting comment was based from the label of the vial that she was holding, which had "For the hearty, loving laughter following the punchline of a joke" inscribed:

"I think I gave her too much."


End file.
